Friday, October 31, 2008

Ghost in the machine.

My normal Halloween blogging glee has been curbed by the evil spirits that have taken over my computer. The pictures I wanted to blog about are on the computer and the computer is possessed. Oh well. I never take down Christmas before January 7, so maybe I'll have an extended Halloween season this year on the ol' blog. It's not like you guys start thawing your Thanksgiving turkey and dreaming of stuffing on November 1, or anything. (DO you?) If my dear bro is able to exorcise my computer in the next few days you will soon read harrowing tales of mackerel pudding; Uncle Wiggly; fearsome daisies that grow out of graves; and Domo, my ferocious Japanese pocket-monster.

However, even from this alien computer I can tell you a little Halloween tale o' horror, in honor of my brother (who as we speak is attempting to cast Legion out of my laptop).

e upon a time, there was a lovely little sausage called Baldrick. He was made from bits of mysterious and sinister things, but people ate him anyway. And then they died.

The end.


D'Arcy said...

Legion was the most haunting of tales for me as a youth....possessed pork is never any good.

Carvel said...

Forgive me for being delighted to know a fact which probably you're too young to know: That his name is spelled Uncle Wiggily, not Uncle Wiggly!
I'm surprised that even on the Internet you found that photo!
I suspect you stole/borrowed the name Baldrick from that BBC comedy show - I just forget the name at present. But I like your story.
Thanks for this new post: I've been looking for a new post for ever so long.
Happy Halloween! About 30 or 40 trick or treaters came tonight to our house.

sharonsfriendjen said...

That was a disturbing tale you told about Baldrick. Now we know why I don't eat pork. You should all do the same! Let that be a warning to ye. I am sorry to hear the devil has taken over your computer. I suppose its better the machine than your brain. Though on days we have all wondered, was that Marie speaking or the devil? Maybe your brother should do an exorcism on you, just in case. :) I hope you had a great Halloween, sorry I was lame this year. Oh and I am one of those weird-o's anticipating the thawing of the turkey on November 1st. Maybe it is I who needs an exorcism, haha!!

wynne said...

An EXTENSION of Halloween?



Oh, I'm in.

wynne said...

And Baldrick...what a loverly sausage. I'd eat 'im.

Shame about the computer, though.

Wait--you didn't try and feed your computer any pork products, did you? Because that can really screw up your processor. Really gunk it up. Trust me. I've seen it in action.*

*Not really.

April said...

I'm more disturbed by the picture than the tale.

Marie said...

D'Arcy -- I know! My mom was studying Hebrew when I was young so she got those Genesis Project videos of the New Testament done in Hebrew with English overdubbing. The possessed man in that version of the Legion story was so disturbing that I had nightmares. You know you're a lousy parent if your kids get nightmares from your FHE lesson.

Dad -- Thank you for educating me on Uncle Wiggily -- he's been visiting me for years now, and I didn't even know how to spell his name. There's an episode of Blackadder in season three in which they're talking about how every person has one great novel in them, and Baldrick says he has one, too, then offers up a two-sentence story about a sausage named Baldrick. It's an inside joke between me and The Boy. Once when he was a teenager he jokingly asked me to tell him a story and so I told him the sausage story. Now when he asks me to tell him a story I'm expected to come up with an impromptu variation on the sausage story that fits whatever's going on at the moment.

Jen -- It's not the pork -- I think it's the shape, because I have the same problems with turkey sausages. I missed you on Halloween, but I hope you guys had fun. Everyone kept asking if I was Mrs. Peacock from Clue. THE NERVE! I should have worn a sign around my neck like you. Sigh.

Wynne -- Yes, I hereby proclaim this National Halloween Extension Week. However, failure to file your lunacy returns by November 7 will result in fines from the IRS (Irrational Rabid Squirrels). Thank you for the pork product advice, but again -- I can't blame the pigs. It's the presentation.

Sharon said...

Can we extend it until the weekend before Thanksgiving so that I have time to make my Cousin It costume and use my new voice-changing box?

Marie said...

Sharon -- Yes! If Tim Burton can conflate Halloween and Christmas, I think you can do Halloween and Thanksgiving. I dare you to show up for Thanksgiving Dinner as Cousin It. See how many times you have to say "please pass the butter" with your voice changer before someone gets what you're saying.