Monday, April 23, 2007

Malarkey, nonsense, piffle, poppycock,

Okay, kids -- as you may know, last month we started an informal game of Balderdash (a.k.a. the Dictionary Game) in the comment section of one of my postings. However, it got buried as the new posts piled up, so Wynne requested that we start a new game by giving the game its own posting.

So here we go! Wynne's going to post the first word. If you've never played the game, the point is to make up a fake definition for the word that is convincing, or funny, or both. In the real game you would also get points for knowing the real definition, but that doesn't work well online since it's so easy to Google a word, so we'll just do bogus definitions. Post as many definitions as you like for each word. Feel free to post a definition on any past word that strikes your fancy, even if the person who chose the word has already revealed the true meaning. Also feel free to post your own word once the previous word has had a couple of responses. No points -- just a special commendation to the first person to make a reader blow milk out their nose.

So put on your B.S.-ing caps and get goofy!

P.S. I'm going to add a "Balderdash" link in the sidebar that will take you directly to this posting when it's been buried by other posts.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Gadabout girl, take two.

I failed to register my glee a few weeks back when the crocuses popped up, right on cue. So thank you, Dear God, for bringing them back one more time. It's the same show year after year, but it never gets old. And here are those yellow tulips I was dreaming of back in December. Huzzah!

Also in springy blisses: magnolias, wisteria, forsythia. And who says xeriscaped gardens have to look drab and weedy? This one made me very happy.

At the top of the Avenues there is a house covered in gargoyles (it is a well known fact that the eccentricity level of Avenues dwellers increases as you go up the hill). You would think that five fearsome gargoyles would be sufficient to keep the house safe from all manner of imps and demons but it appears that this paranoid home owner is covering his bases, just in case his dragons are more bark than bite....

Also at the top of the Avenues on Eccentric Street, an owl-faced ostrich planter beast constructed with scrap metal. He is sporting a lovely pair of sparkly earrings. As a rule I loathe yard art, but he was a very charming monster.

Someone forgot to take the Christmas baubles out of their tree and now they're nestled in snowy pear blossoms. I loved the reflections of the flowers in the silver balls. Winter mirroring spring?

This here is where there used to be a stone observatory tower overlooking the Salt Lake Valley. Are you miffed that I just wasted your time showing you a nonexistent tower? Yeah, so was Sharon. Moving on...

Note the very tiny window by the front door of this house, covered by a very tiny iron grating. The window of a dungeon? Built by the master of the house to hold the lusty mailmen whose love children now run in the yard? A cautionary tale for other promiscuous postmen who might darken his doorstep?

To be continued....

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

The movie inspired by the blog.

What?! You don't enjoy reading long posts about my underarm hygiene? What kind of friends ARE you? I'm so hurt. You'd better watch out, or I might start writing about real issues, like Dick Cheney speaking at the BYU Commencement. Heaven save us.

No! I shall not abandon trivia just because of this peer pressure! I shall continue sifting and re-sifting my Jane Doe existence for pithy observations! (And if not pithy, then funny; and if not funny, then well phrased; and if not well phrased, then...I'll just find a really snazzy picture to distract you.)

In the meantime, here's a little video for you -- I'm hoping you will find it much less taxing to watch a short narcissistic movie than read a long narcissistic blog. I care about you, faithful reader, even when you refuse to gaze into my navel.

NOTE: If the video gets stuck, click on the progress bar just after the marker.