Sunday, August 17, 2008

At midnight I turn eggplant.

It ain't no mean feat finding a reasonably attractive dress that covers all the necessary bits of the she-Mormon physique. That is why when dress-hunting for Rachel's dance party I finally gave up trying on the *&%#!! things in dressing rooms and instead decided to buy every last dress that might conceivably suit and then try them on in the comfort of my non-fluorescently-lit home. By the time I found and fell for this little orange number I had already purchased $500 worth of lesser dresses. (Which will all be returned, of course -- if you have ever worked in customer service I hope you can forgive me this evil, evil shopping stunt -- I never got to go to the prom, so maybe we can call this my delayed D├ębutante Phase? Please?)

Yes, an orange dress. A shiny, solid orange dress. Stop laughing, you! I like orange. And I would have you know that They are calling orange the new black. Which is funny, because aside from a lady in green and a lady in red, I was the only lady not in black. For once ahead of the fashion curve? More likely fast-tracking to fashion obsolescence. Come to think of it, I found the dress on the clearance rack with some other orange items, so this no doubt means that my Bold Fashion Statement was no such thing. Pooh.

Oh well. I had much fun even though my second-rate fairy godmother allowed me to show up as a dancing pumpkin. That Rachel sure knows how to throw a party, and she knows how to dance, too, as you can see:*

She's a visionary hostess, that one. Great invitations, great choice of band, great job convincing substantial numbers of men to dance. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she also arranged for that lovely summer thunderstorm. A little less wind next time, though, Rachel. Some of us forgot to wear slips under our flimsy orange wrap dresses....

*See the pillar and A-beam behind the dancing Rachel and Kendall? That is the very pillar that Rachel had climbed earlier in the day and the very A-beam that she bravely sidled out upon in order to A) thread the supports for the Chinese lanterns and B) get herself covered in grime. I doubt she'd admit to intentionally getting covered in grime, but I'm quite sure she did, if only subconsciously, because it sure added drama to her Cinderella transformation at nightfall. Cleans up nice, don't she?


Leah said...

You are a sexy beast!

If you wear that baby around much, black will be the next orange.

And I live in NY. That makes me an expert on black.

D'Arcy said...

That dress is amazing! eye popping! elegant! and the perfect color for you. Wherever did you find it? I want one.

What cool friends to throw such a party, any occasion? Or simply to show off the dance moves?

wynne said...'s a beautiful dress! You make a ravishing pumpkin, Marie.

And it looks like a splendid party. Is that a dance card on your friend's hand?

As far as orange being the new black...I get confused when fashion gurus do that kind of thing. I mean, if "green is the new pink," "orange is the new black," and "brown is the new red," well...huh? So what does the rainbow look like nowadays? And I think that pink and black go well together, but not green and orange so much...I get so confused.

April said...

Marie, you look gorgeous in that dress! Orange is definitely a great color for you.

I like that when Rachel finds out she's actually posing for a video instead of a picture, she kinda shakes her fist. Makes me laugh!

Amy said...

Oh, I LOVE the dress!Mostly BECAUSE it is orange...great color!

Anna Maria Junus said...

I hate customer service, so I've never understood buying things to bring them back. It just means two painful trips to the store instead of one.

sharonsfriendjen said...

Your dress is beautiful!! I think orange is definitely your color. You should invest in more orange clothes.

I am glad that you got to have a second chance at the prom dress frenzy from your youth. I didn't go to prom either, I always wanted a big fluffy number myself. :)

I worked in customer service, its a fun job maybe 35% of the time. Good luck returning the dresses, hopefully they don't have crazy restrictions like the place I worked when I was a kid.

Princess Jess said...

fabulous, fabulous dress! and you are stunning in it. well chosen.

cluckyducky said...

I think a more glamorous name is in order to match such a glamorous dress. How about "persimmon" or "saffron"?

This is Hsin by the way...

Hey, It's Ansley said...

What a fun night! You really do look amazing! I love that orange. I'm sure I have a whole slew of angry customer service people, you really can't buy something for an important occasion in a store. It always involves lot of returns.

Marie said...

Leah -- Thanks! And please resist buying a black wedding dress. And please start a wedding blog.

D'Arcy -- That would be Banana Republic. The occasion was that Rachel wanted to dance and play matchmaker.

Wynne -- Yes, a dance card. Old things are made new...including the rainbow?

April -- Thanks! I think I understand her frustration -- it's so much easier to capture just the most charming bits of reality when you're dealing with a still shot.

Amy -- I liked that you chose yellow for your wedding. Matches your personality. I will be choosing orange, even though my personality is more taupe.

Anna -- I know. The dilemma is this: I loathe malls. I can either take two quick stabs at it (buy everything in sight, escape, then bring stuff back after I've had a couple weeks to recover) or force myself to linger there for hours and make final decisions the first time around. I usually choose option #1 -- the less fuel efficient choice, which is also the sanity-preserving choice :)

Jen -- Yeah, I wanted fluffy, too. :) If they don't take them all back, I'll just have to open dress shop...

Jess -- But not as great as that sari you bought... colors!

Hsin -- Persimmons are beautiful, but they suck all the fluid out of your face in a truly unpleasant fashion, so I'll go with saffron :) You've finally got a cooking blog?? Excellent!

Ansley -- Bless you for validating my indulgence :)

Carvel said...

That dress really does seem to enhance your everyday beauty. Maybe you should obtain other orange clothing, orange shoes & purse, orange scarves, etc., to wear to church, WalMart, & wherever.
Would driving an orange car, or carrying an orange lunchbox be excessive?
I wonder which intense color might do that much for my financial well-being?